Sunday, October 30, 2011

I'm becoming 'that mom'

Before I became a parent, I was horrified by people who controlled their child's every move. I knew I'd never be 'that' mom- I would let my kids do as they pleased, be free thinkers, teach them to love life. But then, this dye thing happened and I've become a helicopter mom. For example, recently we were at the doctor's office. This is what went down:

Nurse: Look at those cute kids! I bet they'd like a sticker!
Me: (distracted and busy, because I'm the idiot who brought two children with her to an appointment) Oh, nice!
Nurse: (comes back with her hands full of suckers) Which flavor would you like?
Me: (Oh crap. She said *sucker* not *sticker.* I wave my arms in distress and beg her not to let the boy see them)
Nurse: (Shooting me a look of confusion and bewilderment) Um, ok??

Yes, I'm now the mom who won't let her kids have suckers. No one gives out dye-free lollipops, because they cost eight times as much. I panic at the sight of candy. Halloween might give me an aneurysm. And why do doctors give out candy anyway? Surely there are more families like mine? Or diabetics? Or good old fashioned health nuts?

When the boy sees brightly colored candy, I tell him he can't have it because it makes him sick. He's starting to understand, but no one can resist a bag of Skittles. I try to keep a Trader Joe's sucker in my purse but they don't last long in there (hey, Mama needs a sugar fix now and then!)

At restaurants, a well meaning server will offer mac 'n cheese or orange soda like it's no big deal. My friends and family haven't quite realized how one slip up will have an effect on my life for days. I feel like I'm trying my best to keep my kid healthy and happy; I'm sensing that those close to me and my family think I'm micromanaging.

So, the next time you see a mom get a twitch in her eye when her kid is offered a 'harmless' sucker, don't judge her, *please.*

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